Is It Divine Retribution?
Or am I just being dramatic, Papi?
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¡Hola Papi!
Am I experiencing the wrath of God? My partner and I opened our relationship up (trendy!) about a year ago, and honestly, it's going great. I love my boyfriend, and I love having sex with strange men from the internet. The only problem is that, since opening things up, I've been constantly sick.
We're being really careful about STIs, but still, everytime I sleep with someone else, my body punishes me in a new evil way I never even considered a risk. The worst of it was when I got norovirus from eating ass in a threeway and had to be hospitalized! I've never been religious, but it does feel a bit like I'm being cosmically punished for being a slut. Or maybe my immune system is simply too weak for non-monogamy? But I was pretty promiscuous before my partner and I got together, and I had no trouble staying healthy. Is it possible a divine being would trouble itself with the sex lives of chaotic bisexual twenty-somethings? I don't want to close things off again, but I can't live being constantly ill. Papi, what should I do?
Sincerely,
A Sicko
Hey there, Sicko!
I appreciate you bringing me this mess. I must admit, it fills me with nostalgia for the days when I used to run ¡Hola Papi! for Grindr. Ah, sweet memories. I was answering letters about the legal status of poppers in various countries and talking twinks out of catfishing sugar daddies on dating apps. Now, I affirm people’s feelings. Not that I’m complaining, mind you, but one does occasionally yearn for the gritty days of “I think I accidentally killed my ex by doing a forbidden brujería ritual, should I turn myself in?”
Sorry, I forgot your question. What were we talking about?