Jenna in the Lion's Den

RHONY recap and review

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Well, that was unpleasant. This episode of RHONY showcased a lot of the kind of behavior that really drives me up the wall. We have a big group of people shit talking someone minutes before they walk into the room, twisting someone’s words to make them look bad for the sake of gossip, and callous insensitivity towards another person’s insecurities. 

But perhaps all that is a sign that RHONY is coming into its own. It’s good to have drama and villains. That’s what makes people post on social media about the show. As someone who has often felt like he is one of fifteen people watching the reboot, I definitely invite that! But it didn’t make this episode any less irritating for me, personally. Everyone except Jenna, Jessel, and Ubah, you’re being put in timeout. 

To catch you up to speed, the ladies are heading to Anguilla, a Caribbean vacation spot, for a girls’ trip. Yay! But, there’s a hitch in the plan. Jenna, who just underwent a dental surgery (her genetic disorder affects her teeth) will be flying there two days early to get a tan because she’s insecure about the discolorations on her skin. Oh, and maybe because she found a flight that has business class. Everyone else will be flying coach. Suffer, poors!

Jenna discloses all this in confidence to Erin, who has brought her some homemade butternut squash soup, a claim I for some reason do not believe. Armed with this information, Erin Iscariot heads to the airport a few days later to meet up with Jessel and the Cackling Hags. Mind you, when last we left off, Erin stormed out of a wreath-making party with all these people present, but I suppose it’s kind of whatever. 

When we arrive at the villa (and after an absent Jenna is assigned the worst room, which is fair) the women are treated to a truly massive spread of food, which you would think might make Sai more tolerable, but doesn’t. While eating, Erin tosses Jenna under the New York double decker tour bus and announces that the reason she flew in early was because she wanted to get a tan, but mostly because she refused to fly coach. “She didn’t tell me not to tell anyone,” she reasons.

This, of course, irks everyone else. Sai says it’s the corniest excuse she’s ever heard. The rest of the evening becomes a sort of Jenna-centered bitchfest. Sai is still, still upset about the gifts Jenna gave them, because she truly, in her heart of hearts, believes they were only given to get her to post about them. For evidence, Sai mentions Jenna posted a video on social media of her boxing the gifts and talking about where they were from.

Okay. But these are small businesses, and a shoutout from Jenna Lyons on social media is probably really good for them! It’s nice! That’s Jenna using her platform to bring some attention to other creators. I get that Sai is a professional influencer and she probably sees absolutely everything as spon, and, yeah, I imagine Jenna probably is taking advantage of her position on a reality TV show to do some advertising, but I fail to see how any of this is a big enough deal to be carrying on about it across two episodes. Ugh, I can’t believe she gave us all those gifts. Not beating the cackling hag allegations, I fear. 

Now it’s Brynn’s turn. She remarks that Jenna doesn’t understand the basics of girls' trips, because getting there together is a big part of the fun. And, you know, sure. But I think with Jenna in general, there’s an absolute refusal to take her at her word that girls’ trips make her nervous. I think some of these women are intimidated by her, or they’re jealous, or they have some unresolved mommy issues, and they can’t conceive of a world in which Jenna Lyons has social anxiety. 

When Jenna finally does arrive, the knives are out, and Erin, Sai, and Brynn take turns smacking her around. You can tell, while Jenna speaks, that she’s tripping over her words a bit. It really struck me as nerves. Then, the thing that really gets me goat, Erin, in a confessional, says, “[Jenna] doesn’t know how to be in a group of girls and to be open and honest. She would do so much better if she could just say, ‘Hey, I’m not flying coach with you bitches.’”

Erin, your friend confided in you mere days ago that she’s self-conscious about her body, that the idea of being around the other women on the beach makes her feel insecure because they’re so gorgeous, and that she’s dealing with issues relating to her appearances after undergoing multiple treatments involving her teeth, skin, and hair. You were the one who erased all that and made it about her not wanting to fly coach.

Honestly, it makes me want Jenna to drop the nice act and remind these girls who she is. One person in this room has styled a First Family, run an international brand, and been named “the woman who dresses America,” while another has an Instagram page, or something. That’s right. I’m siding with the establishment. I’m joining the class war on the side of class. Jenna Fucking Lyons gets to fly business class whenever she pleases. #ImWithHer. 

Anyway, the episode ends with Jessel in Jenna’s quaint quarters in the villa, where Jenna says she’s not in a place in her life where she’s willing to compromise to please people. Unfortunately, she is on a reality television show, so we’ll see how feasible that is. 

And now it’s time for the power rankings / detention. 

Erin Lichy

You know, when you stormed out of the wreath-making party last episode, Jenna was pretty chill about it! She even sat down with you and said she would have gone after you if she’d known you weren’t coming back. You should know how it feels to have everyone be against you in a social setting, but then you go and stab your ally in the back and put her in a similar situation? Jail! 

Sai De Silva

Sai is grating on my nerves lately. I’m tired of her complaining all the time without bringing much to the table herself. She reminds me too much of myself in this way. 

Brynn Whitfield

I do not understand her hostility for Jenna. Does she have a crush or something? I suppose it’s none of my business. Apparently, next week, we’ll get an Erin vs. Brynn situation, so we have that to look forward to.

Ubah Hassan

Ubah returned from COVID leave and immediately got to work stirring the pot regarding Brynn’s behavior at Erin’s flop party. Seeing Ubah reminded me of how much I love Ubah! So, that’s good.

Jessel Taank

All along, she was bringing the flavour… and it was my fault I didn’t have any taste.

Jenna Lyons

“Latinx.” - Jenna Lyons

See you next week!